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Tuesday 27 March 2012

Spring forward

The air has changed again; days getting longer and evenings, warmer. As I wander along the glistening canal, a swan glides gracefully across the surface and catches my eye. Watching her move through the water, I am lost in time and everything stops still. A memory of me as a boy watching planes thunder down the runway and lift off into the air comes back to me out of absolutely nowhere. I stay there until the sound of a train rattling somewhere in the distance pulls me abruptly out of my reverie. I continue on. The wind picks up and blows through the weeping willow, making the branches sway majestically. A man jogs past me and for a brief moment I can hear his lungs fill with air and quickly empty. I smile as I suddenly become aware of my own breathing and it occurs to me that we are all built the same; we are one. I can't remember the last time I jogged.
The early evening sun continues to beat down onto me and fills me with its last rays of warmth. Soon, the sky will get darker and the air, cooler. In a few short hours I will be turning my clocks forward again before drifting off to sleep. But right now, I'm here, walking along the canal with my bright yellow daffodils lining the path.

Sunday 18 March 2012

59 seconds

59 seconds...
My arms fling around her neck and I pull her in tightly. There we stand in our embrace. The world stops spinning as I feel her chest move in and out with every breath. I can smell her perfume. It throws me right back. With all my might, I pull away and look into her smiling face. Her auburn hair glistens in the sun and is blown ever so gently in the breeze.
47 seconds...
I am finding it hard to form words but I know that I don't have long.
"I have so many questions to ask, I don't know where to begin. Where have you been all this time? I couldn't find you anywhere".
She smiles.
"I didn't go anywhere, my darling. I have been here with you the whole time. Remember the day you stood looking over at the ocean and tears ran down your face? I was there holding you. Just look in the mirror; you have my eyes".
30 seconds...
"Do you have any regrets?"
She thinks about this question for a second.
"Life is too short for regrets, my angel boy. Every choice we make takes us to another place. There is no right or wrong; just life experience. We always get to where we are meant to be eventually anyway. Trust your instincts".
18 seconds...
A breeze picks up and swirls pink blossom around us.
"Why does life sometimes feel so hard? Some days it feels impossible to move through".
Her hands lift up towards my face and as they hold onto me, she looks directly into my eyes.
"There will always be challenges to overcome. That is part of life. Please remember, these are only opportunities to show the world who you really are. We are stronger than our bodies give us credit for. Use these times to shine, my darling boy".
7 seconds...
A wave of anger washes over me as I realise that this is it.
"I miss you so much. I wish you were always here. I have so many questions still to ask".
"I know my angel, I know. Everything we need to know is inside each and every one of us. Never forget how much I love you. I live in your heart. You are never alone".
1 second...
I hug her so tightly; I worry that she might break. The wind picks up...and she is gone.
Just one more minute.

If you could have just one minute more, what would you ask?

Sunday 11 March 2012

Cloudy morning

I close my eyes just as the watery Sunday morning sun finally pushes its way through grey clouds and lands gently on my face. The warmth quickly penetrates my skin and, for a few seconds, I am transported to a desert island somewhere with nothing but the lapping waves around me to keep me company. I am at peace and my mind is still from relentless chatter. Sensing my leave of absence, the clouds pull together and protectively cover the source of light. The air once again turns cooler as the sky closes in.
The squawk of geese flying overhead sends my mind racing once again. In the distance, through a gap in the clouds, bright rays begin to burst through and I wonder who is feeling it on their skin right now. I think about everyone who I have in my life; family, friends, Facebook pals; each and every connection just as important in my life story. A growing cast in the play, all feeling the sun on their faces at different times.
I realise right at this very minute, there are many people scattered across various parts of our planet, somewhere, who I love dearly. Some are probably laughing, some possibly crying but all of them, certainly feeling something.
The air is slowly changing. I can feel it. Soon the clouds will move south to reveal a bright blue, sparkling sky. Until then, I will watch and wait, happy in the knowledge that someone, somewhere is basking in the sun.

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Sunday 4 March 2012

Back to the future

This afternoon, I time travelled.
It came like a bolt out of the blue. Trees and pavement instantly melted away and before I knew it, I had been grabbed and thrown backwards into 1989. Verse to bridge to chorus; each chord holding me tighter and deeper in the reverie. I watched as I lay on my single bed looking up at my prized Kylie poster. Feeling every single piece of emotion rush back through my veins, I had no choice but to stay in the moment, reliving every second of a first love and giant dreams. Three and a half minutes later, I was back to 2012 with a jolt.
This shuffle button was causing me to leap backwards and forwards erratically without any concern for sequentiality. I had only just got my bearings when it happened again. 2009; I observed myself looking out of the tour bus window towards rolling Italian countryside. Engulfed by my history, I witnessed it all over again passively; the warm evening sunset reflecting off the glass on which I rested my head; it all felt so real. I was back.
Once again, the song faded out as I was picked up and flicked back to the future. And this continued on for the duration of my journey. Some songs made my stomach ache; some brought a big smile to my face.
Music is the soundtrack to our lives and as we move forward, certain songs will act as a personalised time travel machine. If we are lucky enough, these tunes will connect us to a moment in our story and be a reminder of how far we have come on our journey and how far we have yet to go.